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Basically a mikvah is a ritual pool of water, built according to very specific requirements in the Torah. The bor or actual pit of the mikveh must be filled with rain water which is drawn by natural means into the pit and then this pit or bor is connected to a larger pool of regular water (through a hole ) and the entire pool then attains the status of a kosher mikvah. Immersion in the mikvah renders a woman pure after she has uterine bleeding (ie. due to her period, after giving birth or for other hormonal reasons).

One does not have to be an observant Jew to keep the laws of mikvah: it is something which can be done by any Jew, no matter what their level of observance or commitment. One might well ask why a non-observant Jew would desire to keep mikvah? Well, many people do so because they find that it enhances their marital relationship and romance, many people who could not become pregnant were blessed with children upon going to the mikvah and many women simply feel that there are health benefits involved (health in both a spiritual and physical sense, since the two go hand in hand).

Mikvah is a mysterious word to some women. But over the past twenty years there has been a tremendous revival of this wonderful Jewish tradition. What is it that is attracting thousands of modern, twentieth century women to start keeping these beautiful laws which have been part of our Jewish tradition for so many thousands of years?

Perhaps it is the element of romance that mikvah adds to a marriage…..or the wonderful feeling of joy and spirituality that accompanies immersion in the mikvah waters…or simply the knowledge that for generations Jewish women have faithfully kept these traditions and laws because they are truly the foundation and secret to the success and purity of the Jewish family.

In the Torah (Bible) we find that Sara, Avraham’s wife, had a special blessing in her home: her Shabbat candles burned from one Shabbat to the next, there was a special blessing in her dough, and a cloud of protection rested over her tent because she observed the laws of mikvah. Rivkah, Rachel and Leah also had these same blessings because they followed in Sara’s footsteps. And this is a gift that all Jewish women are able to have since we are all daughters of Sara, Rivka, Rachel and Leah.

Taharat Hamishpocha is commonly translated as "family purity". But what does purity really mean? In Judaism, pure and impure are completely spiritual concepts. "Tameh" is the word for impure, and anything tameh has a spirit of unholiness within it: it carries a strong potential for negativity. Contact with something tameh closes a person to Godliness and makes it difficult to experience true joy. "Tahor" is the word for pure. Anything tahor leads to happiness and spirituality: to closeness to God and a feeling of elevation. These are spiritual terms and are defined by God Who created the world and instilled within the world forces of holiness and forces of unholiness.

Mikvah and purity go together. Men also go inside the waters of a mikvah in order to achieve spiritual purity. This is the traditional Jewish way to purify one’s body and mind. The waters of the mikvah are referred to by the Rambam (Maimonides, a great Jewish scholar) as the "waters of pure knowledge". What does this actually mean? Impurity includes within itself thoughts of evil and the knowledge of "sin". Pure knowledge is the concept of pure thoughts: of innocence and spirituality. This is the state that existed in the Garden of Eden before Adam and Eve sinned. Immersion in the mikvah purifies one’s mind and is the remedy for bad thoughts and negative thinking.

In fact, on a spiritual level, the waters of the Garden of Eden come to every mikvah and at the time of immersion it is as if one is entering the Garden of Eden and achieving that original level of purity and innocence. That is one reason why we do not wear clothing, jewelry etc. when we go in the mikvah because in the Garden of Eden Adam and Eve did not wear clothing until they sinned since they were originally on a very high level spiritually and their bodies were a vessel for the light of their souls, thus allowing them to feel true closeness to God at all times . Only after their sin when the world lost it’s status of purity and consciousness of Godliness, not wearing clothes became immodest and engenders feelings of shame within a person. The entire idea behind the sin of eating the fruits of the Tree of Knowledge was that people suddenly gained a knowledge of unholiness: the side of impurity. People suddenly understood the idea of being separated and cut off from Godliness which brought about a feeling of tremendous shame. However, at the time of immersion in a mikvah we try to recapture the innocence and spirituality that our forefathers once knew.

When a woman has her menstrual period (or some other bleeding from her womb such as after giving birth etc.) that blood is "tameh" and the woman becomes "nida". Actually any bleeding from the uterine lining (due to natural menstruation or a discharge due to hormonal changes etc.) could render a woman nida depending upon where and when this bleeding is found. Nida actually means separated. It comes from the root in Hebrew "nedar" which means a vow. In the Torah, certain people called nazirs would take a vow to separate themselves from certain physical experiences in order to reach a higher spiritual level. For example, they would vow to abstain from drinking wine etc .

The concept of separation and holiness always go together just as God separated us from the other nations of the world in order that we should be a holy nation to Him.

Under the marriage canopy (the chupa) a woman becomes sanctified to her husband by separating from all other men and keeping herself special for her husband. That is why the word for marriage is "kiddushin" which comes from the same root as kedusha (holiness). The same idea applies to a woman at the time of being nida. She separates from physical relations with her husband until immersing in the mikvah in order to reach a higher plateau in her spiritual growth and in her relationship with her husband. Of course, the husband also grows spiritually at this time and learns to become the master of his physical desires. It is a very positive time: a time of learning and developing, a time of renewal.

The Lubavitcher Rebbe explained the following, according to the teachings of Chassidus: Before the sin of Adam and Eve with the snake, evil was not a part of the human being and the human body was totally pure and holy, knowing only the consciousness of Godliness and purity . After the sin happened, evil entered into the body and psyche of a person, human consciousness fell from a level of holiness and evil became a complex part of humanity. The Rebbe explained that a Jewish body is holy and by nature wants to push outward anything unclean or unholy. So the period a Jewish woman experiences each month is her body’s way of rejecting and discharging the knowledge of evil . It is a woman’s job to bring purity to the world and to her marriage and to rectify the original sin of Eve.

After her period a woman counts seven clean days (days which represent her longing to re unite with her husband and since husband and wife mirror the relationship of God and the Jewish people, this indicates the kind of longing the soul has to be connected to God and the recognition of how far we are spiritually from true holiness ). Part of the laws of counting seven clean days is that a woman cannot be discharging semen during the seven clean days. We know that it takes 72 hours for the body to discharge semen. And in case a couple would have intercourse during twilight ,when it is unclear which day it is and how to begin counting those three days, the women actually came to the rabbis and requested that it be necessary to wait a minimum of four days from the time bleeding commences before starting to count their seven clean days. But it became a custom to add one more day for various halachic reasons, making five days. The strength of a Jewish custom is very strong and one may not change that on one’s own. However under certain special circumstances (ie. sometimes a woman has early ovulation during the seven clean days and she is unable to conceive) she may get permission from a Rav to begin counting her seven clean days a day earlier, meaning she could make her hefsik tahara exam (the initial preliminary exam to verify if all bleeding has stopped before the woman begins to count her seven days) on the fourth day rather than the fifth day, so that she would be able to have marital relations at the time of ovulation and hence conceive. Please note: certain sephardim have the custom to wait only four days rather than five (as long as all bleeding stops by the fourth day) so if you are sephardic, find out if this is your custom.

Once a woman successfully completes counting her seven clean days, she then immerses in the mikveh, which purifies her each time on a higher spiritual level and thus raises her and her husband to a status of greater kedusha (holiness) and sanctity. It is an elevation of physicality and an elevation of consciousness. We will discuss the laws in greater detail later.

Tevilah is the word for immersion in the mikvah. In Hebrew, tevilah has the same letters as the word "bitul", which means self nullification. The inner purpose of mikvah is the idea of nullification of the ego. By immersing in the waters of the mikvah, one loses oneself and becomes totally submerged in and nullified to the water. This self nullification causes one to let go of one’s ego, and this letting go of the ego renders the person a vessel in which God’s light can rest. God’s Presence can only dwell in a place of humility and selflessness. There are detailed preparations which go into immersing in the mikvah. The woman must first bathe herself thoroughly and remove anything that could be a "chatzitza".

A chatzitza means an interference: anything which does not allow the waters of the mikvah to reach every part of the body (ie. ink stains, dirt under the nails etc.). Spiritually, according to Kabbalah and Jewish mysticism, the purity of the mikvah represents the idea of the soul permeating the body with joy. A chatzitza represents a worry which does not let the joy of the soul affect the body totally. The Kabbalah explains that the only positive worry in life is to worry about a chatzitza and this then substitutes for and eliminates all other negative worries of life. All preparations for tevilah must be done in the spirit of preparing for one’s wedding, with great joy. The woman must bathe, remove dirt, cut finger and toe nails and clean them very well, brush her teeth, clean out the corners of her eyes, her nose, ears, naval and all other parts of the body. She must comb out all the hairs on her body so no hairs are tangled together etc.

There are more details to learn about preparation but we will only cover things very generally for the moment (later in greater detail). Once the woman has completed all her preparations, she is then ready to immerse in the mikvah waters.

Some people used to say that women would go to the mikvah in the olden days because it was good for hygiene since they never could take a bath easily. But that is obviously untrue because before immersion one must cleanse oneself thoroughly and only then can one go into the mikvah, and even if a woman takes a hundred baths but she does not actually immerse in a mikvah, she does not become pure and she retains her status of tameh and nida. So it is obvious that the reasons behind mikvah are spiritual and not for physical cleanliness.

The fact that physical cleanliness is part of preparation for immersing in the mikvah is because cleanliness is associated with Godliness. And when one prepares properly one then reaps all the spiritual benefits, similar to the idea that when a radio is plugged in only then can one receive the sound waves and hear the music. The waves are there all the time but if the right connections are not made, one cannot appreciate the music. Keeping the laws of Taharat hamishpocha does have certain health benefits as well, as even doctors have discovered that not having relations during one’s period lessens the risk of cancer of the cervix, for example. But again, the laws are not kept because of health benefits. Health benefits do automatically accompany keeping God’s laws since the Creator of the world certainly knew what things a human being should do or not do in order to achieve maximum health, both spiritually and physically. But the laws are kept simply because they were commanded and they are done in a spirit of humility and acceptance that we cannot fathom the wisdom of God.

There are very exact measurements as to the way that a man made mikvah must be constructed. The ocean , of course, constitutes a natural mikvah. However, not all bodies of natural water meet the requirements of a mikvah (many lakes do, if they have natural springs of water underneath). Certainly a regular bathtub or a swimming pool can never be used as a mikvah for women.

The measurements of the mikvah have deep spiritual symbolism and meaning. The mikvah must be 40 seahs deep. 40 signifies wisdom in the Torah: knowledge.

There are also complex laws as to the way a mikvah must be built and how the water must be drawn in to the mikvah as well as which type of water one can fill the mikveh with: the water must be rain water originally (water from the Heavens) which fills the cistern (bor) of the mikveh and which is connected to the body of the mikveh and constantly mixes with the regular water of the mikveh itself. There are many mystical reasons to all of these laws, as there are behind all the mitzvot (Divine Commandments). And by keeping these laws one can feel the tremendous spiritual benefits and the spiritual elevation which takes place.

Rabbi Yitzchak Ginsburg, in his book "The Covenant of Marriage", discusses mikvah in the following way:

The days of first seeing blood (when one’s period begins) parallels the idea of submission. Upon initially sighting blood, one becomes aware of how distant one is from God and from true purity. It is a humbling experience: a feeling of submission to a higher Force. The husband, by being emotionally close to his wife, experiences the same feelings. They must then concentrate on preparing to draw close again which does not allow any feelings of despair but rather gives the couple a feeling of great yearning to reunite.

Once the initial days of bleeding are finished, the woman must then count seven clean days: seven consecutive days free of any bleeding. The woman examines herself internally twice a day to see if there is no more staining, even minutely.

The seven clean days parallel the spiritual work of separation from evil. During these days the yearning for reunion is very great. But one must check oneself internally in a spiritual sense as well to be sure all thoughts, feelings etc. are directed properly toward holiness. One utilizes these seven days to separate oneself from any thoughts or behaviors which could distance a person from God.

The seven clean days is a feeling of yearning and anticipation for the reunion to come which will then be on a higher spiritual level. Finally the time for immersion and renewal arrives. Immersion in the mikvah is followed by great feelings of joy. The couple experiences simcha (happiness) similar to the feeling they had on the day of their wedding. They refreshen their relationship and truly appreciate being able to be together physically. Their physical union also takes on a more spiritual tone.

According to the Torah, husband and wife are two halves of one soul. They find each other in this physical world and marry. (That, by the way, is one reason that a Jew and a non-Jew are not supposed to marry: their souls come from different sources and are not compatible in the sense of truly being soul mates).

Up in the Heavenly worlds there are also certain levels of a couple’s souls which exist constantly. When a woman is pure down here, then also spiritually it is a time of union of the souls.

This union, which manifests itself down here in marital relations, is able to produce a child. Even if a woman is already pregnant, when she has marital relations she and her husband still produce spiritual children and new souls.

The purity of their thoughts and the modesty of their conduct at the time of their union determines the quality of children they create. And the concept of purity and modesty permeate all the mitzvot: this is the key to our connection to God.

However, when a woman is nida, it would be harmful spiritually for the couple to have relations then. And in fact, couples who do not observe the mitzva of taharat hamishpocha often end up fighting and feeling many blockages to expressing their true feelings or to really feeling close. Many marriages end up in divorce due to a lack of observing these laws. When it is nida time, it is a sign that the couple must learn to communicate without touching. This is an important aspect of marriage : the woman is never made to feel like an object.

God created everything to go in seasons and cycles. The woman’s cycle establishes the physical relations of the couple in the home. After the nida time is over and the woman immerses in the mikvah, it is a time of reunion, like the joy of a bride and groom. This helps to keep the marriage fresh and exciting.

When there are times that a husband and wife cannot be together, then the times that they can be physically close takes on new meaning and their appreciation for each other never wanes, even after 30 years of marriage. Many people complain that the romance in their marriage disappears afer a while and this can cause arguments, boredom, dissatisfaction etc. Through keeping the laws of mikvah, once a month a couple has an evening filled with romance: an evening just for the two of them and this is very healthy for a marriage.

Children also can appreciate and thank their parents for keeping the laws of mikvah. When a woman immerses in the mikvah, she is then able to draw down a pure body and soul for her child: a mind which is not tainted by bad thoughts, unnatural desires, and so on. Since spirituality and physicality are so closely related, when a child is born from a pure union, both the physical and mental condition of t he child will be purer. Genetic problems, psychological problems and other difficulties will be minimized. What greater gift than this could a mother give her child? Judaism believes that every child is a blessing and the more children a couple have, the more the home is blessed. Certain souls are designated to come to your family but it is important to bring these souls into the world in purity, to bring down children who will grow up to be a source of true "nachas’ (pleasure) to their parents and to the Jewish nation.

The Jewish family has always prided itself on having successful marriages and a peaceful home atmosphere. To understand why this has been so, it helps to understand the concept of marriage. Jewish marriage is considered a building. One of the blessings we read under the chupa is to have a "binyan adei ad": an everlasting edifice. Of course, every building needs a strong foundation in order to prevent it from collapsing. The laws of taharat hamishpocha are that foundation.

And we can see that in the more recent decades when many people have not kept the laws of mikvah due to ignorance or misunderstanding, the quality of marriages have not been the same and the rate of divorce has been much higher.

Our sages assure us (and history testifies to this fact) that when a couple observe the laws of taharat hamishpocha, the husband and wife will remain as beloved to one another as on their wedding day. The separation is only a temporary one for the purpose of elevation. And this separation can be used as a mini-vacation and we know that "distance makes the heart grow fonder". The Lubavitcher Rebbe once said that when a couple are together at the time when they should be far, then they will be far when they should be close. And of course when they separate at the proper times then when they should be close they will become extremely close to one another and truly feel one. When a marriage is based on sanctity and holiness, the relationship becomes one in which God Himself is revealed and becomes a partner. This is reflected in the feeling of peace and contentment which prevails in a Jewish home.

And the woman, being the mainstay of the home, is really the one who sets the tone for the purity and happiness of the family. Consequently, not observing the laws of family purity can cause marital strain and tension and can have devastating affects on a Jewish couple leading to arguments, lack of marital harmony and possibly even divorce.

The position of the Jewish woman is a very esteemed one according to the Torah. Throughout the ages Jewish women have always saved the Jewish nation from destruction. It is in the merit of the Jewish women that the Jews were redeemed from slavery in Egypt and it is in the merit of the righteous women of this generation that the Jews will be redeemed from exile. The Jewish woman is entrusted with the three most important laws: preparing for Shabbat and Yom Tov, keeping kosher, and bearing and raising the children based on the laws of observing taharat hamishpocha. So essential is mikvah to a Jewish family life, that the Jewish community is required to sell its shul (synagogue) and even its holy Sefer Torah if they lack sufficient funds to build a mikvah! The mikvah takes priority over all else because it directly affects the quality and purity of one’s children and it affects generations. It is the basis for success in bringing up children who will be open to Torah and Jewish values and who will understand the concept of true modesty and beauty (as it says in the Torah "Kol kevuda bat melech penima: the glory of the King’s daughter is within" Modesty and the laws of taharas hamishpocha go together since that is all part of the purity upon which a Jewish home are based and modesty is a trait which all Jewish women possess deep within).

All Jewish women have a right to enjoy the respect and happiness that comes with properly observing the wisdom of the Jewish traditions. I have a friend who recently came from Russia. She is not yet observant although she is interested in Judaism. But she did agree to try going to mikvah. And to this day she faithfully goes to mikvah every month. Her husband is in fact as happy about it as she is because every time she goes to the mikvah, her husband somehow manages to find a job after that or has additional business. He anxiously awaits her time of tevilah. It is a secret between the two of them that they believe God will bless them with work and money (along with health and all other benefits) when she goes to the mikvah.

And in fact Kabbalah explains that one of the secrets of immersion in the mikvah is that it changes all difficulties in life to chesed (kindness) and makes things easier, which can include making a living easier as well. I once asked this Russian friend if she finds it at all difficult to observe these laws, and she replied, "I love it. And my husband loves it too because it really works!"

BASIC LAWS: (PLEASE NOTE: THE LAWS, AS EXPOUNED BELOW, ARE A COMPILATION OF INFORMATION OVER SEVERAL YEARS FROM MANY ORTHODOX RABBIS AND IS NOT WRITTEN IN FULL DETAILS, SO IF YOU HAVE A QUESTION, PLEASE REFER TO AN ORTHODOX RABBI WHO IS AN EXPERT IN THESE LAWS IN ORDER TO OBTAIN ADVISE). First of all, it is important to explain the function and role of the rabbi in the observance of the laws of family purity. Part of observance of these laws involves many questions (in Hebrew: shaylas). For example, at times the woman may experience staining either during counting of the seven clean days or at other times, or she may find a stain of a questionable color while making an internal examination. At such times it is necessary to ask the expertise of a Rav. Just as one would consult a doctor and trust his advice if there is any problem, in the same way one asks a Rav who is an expert in the laws of nida when a question arises.

God does not put all the responsibility for the laws on the shoulders of the woman. A Rav is an orthodox rabbi who is specially trained and learned in all areas of Jewish law (halacha). Not all rabbis may become a rav. A Rav is a higher level, so to speak, sort of like the status of a doctorate over a masters degree . And when a Rav answers questions according to the guidelines of the Torah, God then gives the Rav a certain inspiration to receive the correct answer and to know what to declare as being kosher and pure or impure. In fact, so important is the Rav that what he declares kosher actually becomes so even if it seems to everyone else that it is impure. For example, at times a woman may show a stain to a Rav that she is sure it is not "kosher". But the Rav may very well declare the stain clean. Once the Rav says something, it takes on halachic importance and in Heaven it is declared the same way.

The entire world was created through Divine Speech. Speech therefore has a power within it to create. And when a person speaks from a basis in Torah (which is God’s wisdom) then he can actually change nature and affect the physical world.

It is very important to find a rav that one feels comfortable with and one should never feel embarrassed to ask a question since that is the job of the rav: he deals with shaylas all day and nothing is strange or embarrassing to him. So the first thing every couple observing the laws of family purity must do is become acquainted (even by phone) with a Rav whom they can call whenever they have a question.

WHAT DOES THE WORD NIDA MEAN?

Nida means separated. A woman who is nida must separate from physical relations with her husband until she immerses in the mikvah. But this separation is only for the purpose of bringing her to a higher spiritual level. Through menstruation she rids herself of spiritual impurities and the immersion in the mikvah renders her pure on a level of true holiness (kedusha).