"Take a step down and select a marriage partner [i.e. there will always be something(s) about a shidduch that you will have to give in on]. A woman would rather be married than live alone. Rabbi Hama Ben Chanina said, "When a man marries a wife, his sins are buried as it says [Proverbs 18:22], 'He who finds a wife finds good and obtains favor from Hashem.' [Yevamos 63b]"

Derech Eretz Raba (chapter 1) says, "Eliyahu Hanovie kisses the man who marries a woman who is fit for him and The Holy One Blessed Be He loves him."

A midrash (source not known) is cited in the famed and respected sefer, Menoras HaMeor, section "To Marry a Wife," part four, chapter two. "The sages said in a midrash that one wise woman directed her daughter when she was about to marry, saying to her, 'My daughter, stand before your husband like before a king and serve him. If you will be like a maid to him, he will be like a slave to you and he will honor you like his master. And if you will make yourself big upon him, he will be like a master over you against your will; and you will be, in his eyes, cheap like one of the maidservants.'"

Rabbi Elchonon Wasserman said that a shidduch should be attractive, good-natured and healthy. The Steipler said that you should not select someone without good midos - who will apply them in practical every day living (e.g. taking good care when the other is sick or taking out the garbage when needed). Are your criteria for choosing someone a true basis for a lasting relationship; backed up by realistic expectations, self-awareness and behavior patterns? What criteria for your mate-search should be negotiable or subject to re-evalution? Think of your "track record," the consequences of your views and choices, and of long run.

[Exerpt of prayer from sefer "Avodas Hakodesh" for a Yoray Shomayim man who wishes to find his mate]. "Master of the universe, in Your kindness, You formed Your world and created man and made for him a help-mate, and You commanded us to marry a woman and have children and Your servants, our sages, were stringent to not delay this mitzva. And since the life of man in this world and the world to come are almost dependent upon the wife, and, due to our many sins we cannot know for sure who is fitting to marry and fulfill Your will, I come before You with a broken heart to plead before You, Merciful Father, to prepare for me the proper mate, who has fear of Heaven, who has all of the good midos; who has good fortune, good intellect, success in her endeavors and blessing; because througfh this I will be able to accomplish holy work without trouble; and may she be suitable for me. In Your great mercy, may you be comapassionate to me and turn my heart to be able to complete my part and fulfill your commandments, and that it be good for me in in this world and the eternal world. You are the only one Who is merciful, compassionate, generous, protector, supporter, rescuer, correct and redeemer. Answer me and hear my prayer, for You are the only One Who hears prayer of every mouth."

[Excerpt from prayer for Yoray Shomayim woman for her mate]. May it be Your will, my G-d and G-d of my fathers, that You should cause me to find, in your great mercy and kindness, the mate who will be proper for me who will provide all of my true needs and the repair of my soul. May he be proper and correct to bring kosher children who will be Torah scholars and tzadikim, people of truth and fear of sin. May this mate be a good man whose deeds are beautiful and who does good deeds steadily. May he be a scholar engaged in Torah for its own sake. May he have fear of Heaven, pursue justice and bestow kindness. May there be no trace of any invalid thing in him, nor blemish or defect. May he not have anger but, rather, may he have all of the good midos, be humble, healthy, capable. May he never cruel to anyone and never evil. May we merit to dwell together successfully."